Loose Shoes & World Views
Loose Shoes & World Views
If you’re like me — which is something you might not want to brag about — you probably have an old pair of shoes hidden in the back of your closet that look like something a homeless person threw away. They’re worn and scuffed and maybe one of the soles has been glued back on but they’re comfortable. They’re loose in the right places and barely snug enough in other places to keep from falling off but they make your feet feel great.
My wife cringes when she sees me wearing those shoes but she knows better than to criticize them or I might pull them out during the week instead of just luxuriating in their comfort on weekends. Besides, those shoes were created with meticulous expertise and were absolutely perfect when they were new. They remind me that somewhere there’s an incredibly talented cobbler.
On the other hand, I’ve got a shiny black pair of wingtips that I occasionally pull down off the shelf, wipe the dust from, and wear to a business meeting. They’re uncomfortable as Hell and they make my back hurt but they’re certainly presentable.
I also have some steel-toed work boots that meet safety requirements of clients’ factories I routinely visit. They’re ugly but functional. Last but not least, I have some cushioned walking shoes that serve their purpose well. There’s nothing remarkable about either the boots or the walking shoes and I only wear them when I need them.
People are a lot like the shoes in my closet. Some of them are shiny and perfect on the outside but being around them too long just makes my brain hurt. Some folks are like my walking shoes — cushiony and pliable, but they’re just begging to be used.
And then there are people like my favorite old loafers. They’re beat up from living a full life, and they’re even starting to come apart at the seams, but they’re sure as heck comfortable to be around. They don’t try to hide all their scuff marks or the holes in their souls. They’re just what they are.
Perhaps it’s time to quit mimicking the shiny slicksters and the co-dependent enablers and just start becoming like those worn and weary everyday types who aren’t embarrassed by their scars and don’t judge our lack of spit-polished presentability. (I made that last word up.) Maybe it’s time to start hanging out with people like my weekend shoes all week long.
Let’s talk. I’d really like to hear what you have to say, and it might even give me something to write about. Email me at guy@lawsoncomm.com.
I’ll buy you coffee and we can compare notes. I promise not to steal your ideas without permission.
Tolerance isn’t about not having beliefs. It’s about how your beliefs lead you to treat people who disagree with you.
— Timothy Keller
The Power of the Other
— Henry Cloud
It’s pretty much impossible to write about relationships without referring to this book because finding the right friends is not the goal. Being the right friend is everything and this book is the ultimate primer of beneficial relationships.
A meeting of great minds who think alike
